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We Really Don't Want to Live in Fear: Overcoming the battle of fear

December 20, 2017

 

"Whatever you fear most has no power- it is your fear that has the power". Oprah Winfrey

 

I had just finished being in my first play which was DreamGirls at Footlite theater. I remember seeing the announcements on the tables in the lobby and it said "Sister Act a divine musical comedy". My heart started pounding because I was so excited, I didn't even have a clue that Sister Act was even a play. I said ok, I think I'm going to audition but then something on the inside of me said, "Who are you going to audition for? You can't audition for Whoopi Goldberg's part you don't even fit the character". I thought to myself you know what I can't audition for this play, now I wish they were doing Sister Act II, I probably would stand a better chance of getting cast.

 

Fear had crept in and I began to listen to it. That night I went home and searched the play on Youtube. There were a couple of versions on there, I happen to choose the one with Patina Miller as Deloris on Broadway in New York. I began to watch the play and the first song that caught my attention was "Fabulous". A little spark on the inside hit me but then I started thinking to myself I can't sing like her. My voice needs a lot of work and at times I sound like I'm a baby. I made up in my mind that evening I was not auditioning for Sister Act. I was in a battle with fear and it was winning.

 

Two weeks before the audition I remember praying to God and asking him, if you really want me to continue with this career, please open a window for me to climb through. I went back on youtube searched the play and began to watch it again. When I watched it another spark hit me and I said,"You know what I am going to audition, not for Whoopi's part but for one of her backup singers". I always laugh at myself because the whole time I referred to Deloris as Whoopi.

 

I walked into auditions terrified and shy. I started thinking to myself, I shouldn't be here but it was too late, I was signed in and the number was placed on my shirt. The next thing I knew I was on stage in front of the directors and others who were auditioning that evening. I started singing " Stop in the Name of love", by the Supremes. I took a deep breath after I finished the song and sat back down in my seat. I knew I didn't sound great but the next part was dancing. This is where I shined and forgot about how I sounded and my fears. I made it through the first audition and here I was sitting in the seats for callbacks. 

 

We went through the process and every woman was called to go downstairs to keep auditioning but myself and two other ladies. I knew at that moment that they didn't like me. A couple of days passed by and I hadn't heard from anyone from the theater. I was at work with the kids at summer camp and I noticed my phone was ringing, it was a out of state area code, I didn't answer the phone because I thought it was a bill collector. I noticed the number left a message. I had been called back for another audition. I said to myself, ok they must want me to audition to be one of Deloris' back up singers, which was Tina and Michelle. I got there and I had to audition for Deloris the main character in Sister Act. 

 

I was riding in the car with my parents on our way to pray with my uncle who had lost his father. My phone started ringing, when I picked up the phone it was Damon the vocal director and he passed the phone over to Paula the director of the show. Paula said these words to me "Morgan unfortunately we want to offer you the role of Deloris". I remember saying to myself, "Are y'all sure"? At that very moment I knew I had won the battle of fear. 

 

For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

 

What if I would've listened to the inner thoughts of fear and not even auditioned? I would've missed one of the biggest blessing that God has given me. So many of us allow fear to stop our progress. We become scared of something that hasn't even happened yet. How many times have you looked back over your life and notice that fear was the main thing that kept you from doing what you wanted to do?

 

Stop letting fear hinder you from your blessing. Do you want to go back to school but think you are too old? Girl byeeeeeee, do it! Do you want to become a entrepreneur? Do it! Do you want to lose weight and have a healthier life style? Do it! Is there is a relationship that is draining all of your energy and you want to let it go? Do it! Is there a passion that you want to pursue? Do it! Don't let fear ruin your life and don't give fear the power.  We only have one life to live, take control of it and own it. We are beautiful, we are strong, we are courageous, we are talented, we are intelligent, and yes we are fearless. Win the battle of fear starting now because once you do, girl you are going to be unstoppable. 

 

 

 

 

 

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